Thursday, December 31, 2009

Happy New Year!

(originally posted in September 2009)

Women often naively assume that the guy who sends flowers every Friday afternoon, without fail, is the stable, loyal and romantic man of her dreams. However, in my experience, I had boyfriends who would shower me with cliche romantic gestures such as my favorite white flowers - while deep inside I knew, the routine of sending flowers was an attempt by these boyfriends to over compensate for lackings in our relationship. Maybe they couldn't intellectually challenge me or the chemistry was less than ideal, but they thought flowers somehow would make it all better. 

I knew my husband was "the one" for many reasons, one of which was he has never routinely given me flowers. Sure he has surprised me with beautiful bouquets once and awhile, but he feels predictable flower giving lacks spontaneity and sincerity. That doesn't mean that he is not romantic - yet he realizes that providing me with everything I could possibly need in our relationship emotionally and physically says more than 1-800-Flowers ever could. A novel I am currently reading features a leading female character who hates yellow roses. She hates yellow roses because she knows every time she receives them from her husband, it means he has had an extra-marital affair.

I am not suggesting to accuse the man in your life of infidelities when tulips appear at your doorstep. However, I think an important lesson can be learned - Seek out a man who (metaphorically) toils, plants and fertilizes in your "relationship garden", and be suspicious of men who think that relationship voids can be filled by ordering flowers online.

1 comment:

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