Thursday, August 27, 2009

Allergic to Love

Dear Danielle,
I am 27 and my boyfriend is 35. We have been dating for seven months, and recently I told him I loved him. He acted very uncomfortable when I expressed my feelings for him, and he has not said "I love you" back. Otherwise, our relationship seems really affectionate and we spend most  of our free time together. I am interested in a long term relationship but I am concerned that my boyfriend is afraid of commitment. Although he says he really likes me he wont discuss a future for us.

Signed,
"Craving I love you"

Dear "Craving I love you,"
If your boyfriend wasn't ready to express his feelings in terms of love, I wouldn't be worried. However, I am concerned because he wont even discuss the future of your relationship. Based on your ages and the amount of time you have been together - it seems like your boyfriend has a serious fear of emotional vulnerability and commitment. He may "like you," but he hasn't shown he considers your relationship anything more than fleeting.  Trying to convince him otherwise is futile. I suggest you give him an ultimatum. Either he can start opening up and let you know what path he sees your relationship taking, or you need to find a new guy who will adore you.

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