Monday, August 10, 2009

Just because I am your wife doesn't mean I can't be your girlfriend

Dear Danielle,

When I was dating my husband he would constantly surprise me with sweet love notes or flowers and always plan original and romantic dates. Now that we are married, he is still more affectionate than ever, however all the date planning has been left to me. Does marriage mean an end to being courted?


Dear "Court-me",

Even the best men often forget that asking a woman on a date doesn't have to end with marriage. We all sometimes get too comfortable in our routines and it takes someone waking us up a bit to remember that in order to keep things fresh, both partners must contribute to spicing things up. Courting should not end at marriage. Many people advocate a scheduled "date night" however I feel that lacks the spontaneity that is essential to genuine romance. Rather, I suggest that you write your husband a love note. Include as part of your message the following line - "Just because I am your wife, doesn't mean I can't be your girlfriend too." Challenge him to find one day during the following thirty days to surprise you in a way that will make you feel like his girlfriend, not his wife. No need to spell it out that you want a romantic date. Let him take control, and I am sure you wont be disappointed.

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