Monday, August 3, 2009

Best Friends Forever?

Dear Danielle,

I am a 25 year female and I have had the same best friend for twenty years. We know everything about each other and up until recently could spend endless amounts of time together. We have always lived in the same cities, gone to the same schools and known the same people. I thought she was going to be my best friend forever. Recently however, we have moved to different countries for jobs and a love interest has threatened our trust of each other and impacted our closeness. My other friends/family tell me this relationship has expired, and that there is no such thing as a best friend forever. I know we both want to make it work, but is it silly investing so much effort in maintaining a best friendship through these challenges - isn't that type of relationship work only meant for love interests?

Sincerely,
"Fearing Friendship Breakup"

Dear "Fearing Friendship Breakup",

A best friendship dynamic is unique and is not comparable to other friendships. A best friend is precious, especially one that has known you since childhood. Don't listen to your friends/family who tell you best friendships aren't meant to be worked on. Every valuable relationship in life takes work to maintain. If our society put more emphasis on maintaining close friendships (which differ from social friendships that revolve around a particular location or situation which usually don't last decades), more people would have better support systems and feel more loved. Best friendships do not last out of coincidence. They last because friends choose to fight for each other despite distance and occasional conflict. Call your best friend. Tell her you love her. Tell her that you have faith your friendship will be able to overcome these difficulties. If you do this you will only be closer in the long term.

1 comment:

  1. If you are this good at this one week in, I can't even imagine how great your blog is going to be in one year, or five years. You are made for this.

    Love

    Your Man

    ReplyDelete